Wednesday, November 17, 2004

If evolution is a theory...

As most readers of this blog probably know, last week a suburban Atlanta county's school board voted unanimously to place stickers inside biology books that say that evolution is "a theory, not a fact." A group of parents has filed suit to challenge the placement of the sticker and a ruling from a District Court judge should be handed down soon. In the meantime,

Michael Manely, an attorney for a group of parents who are challenging school officials, argued that scientists officially consider all ideas theories.

"Maybe we need some more stickers," he said, showing the judge versions questioning gravity and Earth's rotation around the sun.

Probably picking up on this, the hillarious Andy Borowitz (who I had the pleasure of hearing as part of the New Yorker tour in Austin last week) ran this article:


Murphy’s Law Could Be Next, District Warns

A suburban school district in Georgia has thrown itself into the vortex of a legal controversy after deciding to stop teaching the law of gravity as part of its science curriculum.

The Dunnsville Unified School District fired the first salvo in the ongoing debate over the law of gravity last year when it mandated that stickers be affixed to all science texts in the district’s schools indicating that “the law of gravity is a theory, not a fact.”

District superintendent Charles Leverall said that initially it was not Dunnsville’s plan to eliminate teaching the law of gravity altogether, but merely to inform students that there were other equally plausible explanations for why things fall down.

“The law of gravity supposedly began when Sir Isaac Newton saw an apple fall off a tree,” Mr. Leverall said. “We think students are entitled to know that another way an apple comes off a tree is if a talking serpent tells a naked woman to take a bite from it.”

But after coming under fire for the stickers, Mr. Leverall said that the district decided to stop teaching the law of gravity entirely, and was now moving to ban the teaching of the law of supply and demand, as well as Murphy’s Law.


Gravity is clearly a delusional, Satanic theory propogated by the infidel unbelievers. Once we're done with evolution, let's get rid of it, too. Let's just throw out all the scientific achievements after Copernicus while we're at it.


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